Friday, October 30, 2015

How I know................ I am not a man after all....



Soooo far, I am loving the adventure I have embarked on for this year:

One sensual touch session JUST FOR ME per month for one year.

Two receiving sessions in and I had an epiphany ....

After all the jokes and all the conversations in my personal world starting from my early precocious teen adventures and right up to.. well, now…  about having sex “like a man”

There is one way in which my sensual nature is definitely un "man-like”...

Before I go there... let me preface this by saying a few things that have always had me dubbed as possessing a  man’s sex drive in a woman's body:
·        Able to separate sex from relationships (sometimes parallel to but not inherently the same thing as romantic relationships)
·        Enjoying sex just for sex,
·        Being vocal and verbal about liking sex,
·        Talking about sex just like any other topic except more enthusiastically
·        Passionately initiating encounters sexually
·        Having no confusion about having sex first, and then if things go well talking later
·        Being really comfortable in my own body – my own pleasure
·        Totally enjoying my “alone time” and “solo play” without guilt

I had 90+ sexual partners before I started this work and never once felt it had any bearing (detrimental bearing at any rate) at all on my humanity or worth as a person.

For me it’s like learning couples dancing; the more partners you practice with the better lead or follower you become …so Let’s Dance!

My experience of sexuality has always been clear, directed and zesty. I have always been able to distinguish between sex, relationships and that consummate magical phenomenon: a healthy long term sexual relationship

These things allow me to be very successful poly, very good at my job, and very able to help other people find their sensual paths and expressions.

I have always been able to be completely immersed in “it” while I am in it and then not look back when I am in the next activity in life.

................ and after all of that

As I sat down to write reviews and blogs and fill out the templates I was faced straight on and head long collisioned into this:

When someone is offering me skilled sensual touch on my behalf for my own pleasure without need to reciprocate... I care absolutely not at all about the gender or what the person looks like, or age....it's all, completely about the quality of the touch of the hands, or pertinent body parts...

Completely...

In all my collecting of ideas of who to see - not once did the pictures, or demographics matter in my selection. This blind spot is so big that I would have to go back and look up eye color, and stats if I had been filling in on a "real" review...

This creates a HUGE blind spot so to speak for me when seeking to communicate with potential clients and one deep gulf tween the quality of experience tween me and a male person writing a review on the same person I would see

Well, ain’t that amazing.

It had NEVER been so clear to me how little that matters to me.

I have always said I don't have a type.

When I used to be a New Horizons Guest (as a member from 18years old til the month they closed their doors) the couples I was drawn to were the ones with the glimmer in their eye and the loving shared touches toward each other vs. the eye candy.

In my personal partnerings I have dated from 23 years older than I, to, ummmmmmmmmmmm 21 years younger (but not going lower than that! - I figure the ages must have balanced out by now)

When dating or marrying, I have ranged from co-ed bimbo status to uber cougar poly collector... But never has it been about the Visuals....

It makes me wonder how many clients out there who happen to inhabit male bodies have this same experience. None? A small percentage? Only when it's someone they have bonded with over time?

It also makes me wonder, would it be this way for me if I were seeking male practitioners? Or FS, or  male FS? Would it be different? Is it because FSBT is so much like massage and I have never ever looked up a person’s picture before booking a massage for medical massage, at a spa, on a cruise ship or for any other reason.

Does sensual touch fall so so firmly for me under totally selfish receiving that visual attraction just doesn't blip my radar? Or is it always secondary for me to the quality of touch, the depth of connection, the eye contact and the communication and presences? It sounds like perhaps an experiment for next year is in the making. (Perhaps 2016-2017 is Ananda’s year of F/S adventures).

But for now, for this year.. I am just sitting with this revelation that I am wired differently, not just upholstered differently than many clients.


Thursday, October 15, 2015

A JoyFull Crescendo .............. Music to MyOhMy...... (2/12+1)




A JoyFull Crescendo .. Music to MyOhMy......   

(2/12+1) Thursday, Oct. 15 at 12:30 for a 90 min. Healing Touch Session.

Ananda’s Narrative:


This was my second "just for me" and "not the driver" session. 


So many of things I want to say I already put into the details below but something feels better and more complete about also writing about the experience as it unfolded. 

This being my second time out I tried really hard to plan my drive to be timely and courteous. No such luck I still found myself late; having not expected as much volume on highway 167 northbound as there was. In a panic I texted my "dispatcher" Mr. Trucker for emergency back roads suggestions and reassurance. He has become something of my co-pilot for some of these ventures in driving. I eeked through traffic and finally got to the call in point, stressed but reassured by a lovely talk in voice. 

Once parked and on my way to the studio I immediately felt better. This really is like coming to a lovely bed and breakfast art and music conservatory. Classy, colorful and welcoming. I was greeted with canine wiggles and warm hugs. I was offered and accepted a shower to knock the sweat from driving and nerves back and off of me. I fell in love with the little shower and spa like room. With Ocean colors and clean and bright tile and walls It was like a mini cruise feel. 

I was almost as nervous as with my first experience with the lovely Alice but JoyFully coaxed me into the lovely healing touch room, sat me down on the comfy futon and treated me to a lovely comfy brain - offing foot-soak and scrub while she helped me drop into my body and out of my brain. We spoke of being able to just be body based and body led. It was soooo good to just close my eyes and know I was in good hands and I really felt I could let go. 

I alternated between eyes open taking in all the colors and art and the beckoning silky table sheets in contrasting black. Joy was ever classy in silk and lace; soft and satiny as if the silky table was an extension of her person. After the foot-soak and drop in I made for the table happily.

She started my table time session with my face down. She has excellent warm hands, strong and soft and confident. Her touch is imbued with love and healing. This healing integrity permeated every touch and breath from my first arrival to my last hug before leaving. Soon I was sinking into the table with relaxing spa-like music and touch. 


Her first lean ins were silky, then lacy contact and warm skin against skin. Her hands were amazing and her breathing and movements considered, patient and present through out the entire experience. She asked if I would enjoy her being on the table with me and this was another affirmation of how much I really really love "backwards hugs" and being laid on top of when I am face down. 

What a safe, enveloping, cocooning, sexy and connecting embrace. She knew exactly when to be still, to hold steady and to sink in .... it was like being completely floating and out of time and space. 

My entire back was happy and if that had been the entire session I would have left feeling satisfied and pampered. But there was still time to turn over. She was so understanding of my drive and had enough time to continue without pushing her schedule and so I got to turn face up. To this point the touch could have been construed as only nurturing; part healing part mother energy part earth goddess-ee.

I was actually beginning to wonder if there would be a more sensual buildee uppy portion or if this was where today would stay. 


The music changed after I turned, more swingy, more sessi, more .... yes-ee. This is where the healer morphed into the artist and the musician. From overall body inclusion for my front, to absolutely amazing breast and nipple "play" she found senses to pull together, to bring up & to slow down with a tease. 

Her confidence as she blended energy and stimulation from nipples to the shaft and flicking of my ... metronome... with percussive, not too hard, not too light touches and teases.... there was a build that I did not need to steer, manifest, conjure or think about in anyway. 

Once she started down that road to crescendo I was definitely NOT the driver. I didn't need to shift gears, I didn't need to apply the brakes, I didn't need to anticipate the curves. I just got to RIDE. 

There is no way to actually convey in words this experience. All I can to is give approximations of the pure JOY of being able to let go and know that those hands and the orchestrate of this touch composition knew how and when to guide the choir of my nerves. 

As she poured me off the table, she helped me hydrate and fed me happy nibbles and bits while I could still enjoy my bits humming with afterglow I was put just enough back together into "reality" to drive safely homewards. 

This was a stand alone, unique and complete musical, artistic and healing experience of receiving passionate touch without expectation of reciprocity or ego feeding. 

This space of be-ing was completely and utterly held for me, in service to me with no pull to have to create the feedback loop we women so often need to engage in when we touch or are touched. 


I left for my car in a complete state of gratitude, satiation and admiration.


ANANDA’s own Template: (Synopsis in Brief)

Why her? How did I pick this provider?
    Many reasons. Our client overlaps. Our common board involvement and her playful, positive posts and her reviews. Her web-sites words.

Would/Will I come back as a client?
    Yep. for sure.

Would/will I Refer My Favorite Clients?
    Already have before meeting and even more so now. Especially those who are lovers of music.

Would/will I refer my poly-Partners?
    Already have.

Would/will I refer my female friends?
    Already have.

What is the overall Flavor/feel of this experience?
    Immersion, timing, racy and flirty.. if an fbst session could be burlesque in its flirting, sense of humor and zest -this is it.

Was it worth the money, time and Travel?
    Without doubt

What does this person offer that sets them apart/defines them or that no other practitioner offers?
    The musical touch and timing

Logistics:

Her Screening Process:

    Standard Safe Seattle Protocol - references and introduction. She went easy on me since we had already met via client overlaps and referrals and know of each other on the boards and cross threads :)

Her Preferred communication for set up:
    Email and web-site
Her Preferred communication for day of session:
    Phone, voice after morning check in email
Communication (response time/ clarity):
    Excellent
Cloak and dagger rating:
    Clear directions, friendly talk in, easy parking, discreet but not unsettling treasure map

Travel time to get There:
    2 hours - from my studio in south hill to cap. hill ish
Travel time to get home:
    2 hours
Distance Travelled round trip:
    60 ish miles… Graham to Seattle
Was it worth the time and distance?
    YES

Was it a Good value for the service/donation Ratio?
    Without doubt an excellent value for the level of expertise and ongoing continuing education she has invested in for her work.

Ananda’s Template: The Female Version

About the Venue:
    I love her space. Walking up to the door, so much art-inviting-plants and walking into a postcardness. SOOOOO much music everywhere. Music to hear. Music things to play. Books and Music and art. Her space reminds me of the perfect bed and breakfast ...with benefits get-a-way or get-to.

Adjectives:
    Color and Music and Everything Sense-you-all. Grace. Elegance.
Is it pretty
    YES
Is it warm enough
    Yes
Does it smell good
    Yes
Shower
    YES - like a small destination spa… tile and color and like something out of a magazine

Music/sound
    Again - YES!

All five senses?
    Yes, and probably some I didn’t know I had.

About the Session:

Welcoming ritual
So much love the foot soak and warm smile and hugs. Loved the soak and soak was offered lovingly and adoringly. I felt like a princess, a princess who didn’t have to think about a thing left outside.

Refreshments: yes water pre and during and special surprise treat (with treat specific flirting)  after and a sweet taste during before rising from the table

Aftercare
    Touch, shower, comfy sitting ups, water, treats, friendly conversation …

Session length - generous/shy/right on the dot?

    Generous and timely… she knew I had a lengthy drive and was aware of my timing but no sense of rushing

Yoni confidence
    YES. just very much yes. The yoni is an instrument she could teach lessons on.

Timing
    Wow. see narrative.
Patience
    Yes, although she didn’t need to be as she was setting the metronome wound to her specifications.

Build-up
    Yep… even before I felt it coming…

Nurturing/Racey
    Both.

About the Practitioner:

Adjectives:
    Graceful. Warm. Genuine. Healing. Loving. Vivacious. Flirtatious.

Warmth:
    Much.
Friendliness
Putting at easy-ness

Comfort with women: (YES bring it, OH goody - a girl!, well I can, somewhere tween?)

Would/Will I refer my female friends here?
Yes, Would buy them gift certificates.

As a Provider: For my clients:

Would I send my clients here? (My good clients, not clients I haven't seen and just can't fit in, but my favorite clients)
   
Yes. very much yes. especially people of the caliber to really appreciate her artistry and passion.

Would I put my name to their session quality?
YES.

Is is safe
    yes
Is it clean
    yes

Is She genuine?
    yes very much so

Healer vs Playmate vibe
    REALLY both.

Would I spend my clients money there?
    Yep.

How does she talk about Her clients?
    With love. no personal details other than one case who asked me to say hello for him, but overall she loves her work, wants to continue in it and is devoted to continuing to learn and deepen her offerings. She is NOT jaded or bored with her clients or her vocation.

Is she ethical?

    Yes
Do I have any behind the scenes ick/weird feeling (s) ?
    Not a trace

As a Provider - From Practitioner to Practitioner

From - let’s talk shop - to it’s all about me on the table
    Perfect balance

Would I duo with this person?

I would be honored, it would be magic… can’t wait to hear the “play-list” (winks)

Special training/skill-set -(medical/massage/psychology background)
    Much much … music, sensual touch training, immersion and sensory techniques,  … she has quite a resume.

Education: see above

As a Poly Partner

Would I send “my” men (my personal  sweeties/beloveds)  there?

    No Reservations - Completely Comfy Sending
    I would buy them gift certificates

Through the Men’s Lens: Review Format

Hybrid Template:
The Boy Version (Borrowed from the Local Boards /Review Sites)
Service/Session Type
Service Length - 90 minutes
LOCATION: cap hill ish ish
DATE:
NAME: Joyfull
INCALL/OUTCALL: incall
AGENCY OR INDY: indy
ACCURATE PICTURE: yes yes
AGE: mature and youth-full - older than me and young enough in heart and mind and body to keep pace
PERSONALITY: loving and giving and creative
RACE: Caucasian
BODY TYPE:  curvy and comfy and cuddly
WEIGHT: no clue - I am oblivious - see “how I know I am not a man blog”
HEIGHT: not as tall as me
BUST: huggable and generous
WAIST: ?
HIPS:?
HAIR: warm and soft
EYES:
FEET: yep
SKIN TONE:
TRIMMING: clueless
TATTOOS: …
SCARS:...
PIERCINGS:...
MOLES:...
BIRTHMARKS:...
CLOTHES: sexy robe … lacy bits under
GLASSES:
MOANER OR A SCREAMER: breathing with me
ENERGY LEVEL DURING THE SESSION: playful after a relaxing drop me into
MULTI SHOTS DURING THE HOUR: n/a
ACCEPTS FRENCH:n/a
SMOKES:
DRINKS: n/a
KISSES: not this session
FRENCH: n/a
GREEK: n/a
RUSSIAN: not for my bits and pieces but if I had ‘em
DO’s or DON’T’s: be human respectful and open
SCREENING PROCESS: references, email introduction and clear communication
EMAIL: visit her website for contact info

PHONE: given day of
My freewill donation: $240 + tip
RECOMMEND: highly. I wish there were more ways to REALLY let people know about the quality of her work, openly and accessibly.
COMMENTS: see narrative

Final Musings:

I was left completely happy and in awe of her gifts. And saddened that there aren’t more ways to let people know about them. women need her work, men need her work - not only hobbyist but every day people who don’t even know what hobbying is. There needs to be a way for her work to be honored openly and safely where people of many more starting places can find a path to her world.